So it’s been a little over 3 months since my boyfriend broke up with me. It’s important for me to make this distinction because...well I’m not sure exactly why yet but it does.


As I look back at the relationship I never thought that my life would be perfect for a Shirley Strawberry Letter 🍓. Well meaning friends all say “the best way to get over a man is to get under a new one” 🤦🏾‍♀️. While I know they mean well it’s hard for me to even think along that line because truthfully I am still in love.


It’s so hard to say when you think about how shabbily I was treated in the ending of our relationship but it’s been said and it’s the truth. I followed all the pre-relationship advice regarding dating with a child except my mother’s advice which was—“Don’t Do It! You have enough on your plate” 😂🤣😂. I even paid attention to “Uncle” Steve Harvey and followed the 90 day probation rule. I waited until his intentions were verbally discussed before I exposed him to my son. I was careful and cautious because I had not only my heart and emotions to consider but that also of my son. But I digress into a postmortem analysis which this is not about.


When I broke up with Jeremy’s dad getting over him was easy. The relationship was defunct and the decision was mine. But this is different...it’s raw because I didn’t choose this it was chosen for me.


So how do you start to mend a broken heart?

• For me the first thing was to get rid of anything tangible that was given to me during the relationship. If you have been following my blog…I sent him all of the things that he gave me back. {CHECK OUT PREVIOUS POST GROWTH IN BREAKING UP...PRICELESS}

• After sometime I made the next step and I wrote a letter. Not to send it but more to get my feelings out of me; a sounding board. This was cathartic and helped my mind start processing the loss and separation.

• Prayer has always been a large part of my life; in medical school I was considered the class chaplan even students who did not share my faith still participated in our class prayers before exams. When going through loss there is no one better to turn to than The Lord. For me expressing my frustration, confusion, and hurt pulls me closer to Him.

• Patience with my heart and myself. Getting over a broken heart is never an easy thing. Trying to rush the process because others keep telling you that you are better off etc is not the answer. I am taking the time that I need. I acknowledge that I am still in love and I am patient with my heart as it heals. I didn’t fall in love overnight and I won’t fall out of love in overnight either.

Exactly how far do you take the quote...”When you have a child it stops being about you and it becomes about them?” Do you take that to the point of total personal depravation or is there a happy medium?

Over the past 2-3 months I have had time away from my little one to do some of the things I enjoyed before him. A friend of mine questioned my excitement at having time away from my little one. At first I was perplexed that my excitement was deemed abnormal. I then began to question myself—Why was I excited? Why did I seem to make such a big deal out of it?