Living inter-generationally is not an easy feat and truly it’s not to be entered into lightly. While I’ve never been married I think I’m safe when I say that it’s almost as perilous as marriage. So my quick story in how I ended up living intergenerationally was that I have a home about 1 hour away from my ‘rents. I became pregnant, made the decision to raise my child as a single mother, and changed jobs and my parents house was closer.
So it started out as a temporary change due to logistics that has continued on due to convince and a sense of familia. Going through this process there are things that I have learned about what it takes to live successfully as a GAWD (Grown Ass Woman Da** It) with your parents in their house.
Even if you are moving in with your parents to save money—do not take advantage of their good nature. Contributions to the household needs no matter how small go a long way. My parents won’t let me pay rent because in their mind I’m paying for a mortgage which is true. So I buy food to keep the fridge stocked. If there is something that is needed like a new filter for the fridge I’ll purchase it. Laundry detergent, soap, lotion, etc things that we can all benefit from I purchase so that they do not. Its a small token and way to give back to them.
BE FLEXIBLE AND PATIENT:
Flexibility and patience go hand in hand. If your parents are anything like mine they raised you to respect your elders and also to have a strong personality. Living in a combined house with such strong personalities can cause friction. Add on raising a child as a single parent and you have a potentially explosive situation with a differing of opinions. I will admit my head is hot at times and I’m very strong willed, I was raised to be so by my parents. As a grown woman living in my parents house patience and flexibility have been imperative skills; and I must admit that I am still cultivating them ??♀️.
Overall one must be intentional. Intentional with how you start and end your day. Intentional with your inner circle of friends and what you allow to influence your sphere. Intentional in seeking out opportunities for growth and new experiences. Intentional in spreading positivity towards others.
Embracing my imperfection and striving for perfection through grace.